so, i've been thinking for a while

and what better time to finally start a royals blog than now? (uh, blog? i hate that word. yes, i realize i'm on "blogger". no, i don't like it, either) anyway, my royals, uh, journal (i guess) wouldn't feel right if it didn't start on a totally disappointing note in a completely stupid season. royals lose 3-2 to the braves on a jason grimsley special -- either the sinker "wasn't sinking", or the hits "fell in place", or he "just didn't get the calls"...but, basically, i'm not sure i've ever seen grimsley really pitch effectively in a game when he actually needed to (i.e. when he comes in to protect the lead, which some people would refer to as the role of the "set-up man"). basically, the "sinkerball" never sinks. the "seasoned" veteran manages to substantiate his experience by proving that some players never learn much (but, remember that "seasoned" portion of it..) basically, i cringe when i hear he's warming up. i chomp my nails when he jogs in. i'm going bald because they actually let him pitch. i've heard he's a free-agent, and slight (very, very slight!) trade-bait. royals: please stop thinking of yourselves. save me! i can't take him anymore.

and so, in honor of trading jason grimsley, i offer some of the best deals made in the past (courtesy of "The Baseball Catalog" by Dan Schlossberg). allard, this is for you:

Another great hurler, Robert Moses (Lefty) Grove, got started toward the majors by being exchanged for a center-field fence...(ed: allard, you could have saved beltran from lurkingly killing your trade potential..)
The Wichita Falls, Tex., team once traded Euel Moore for a plate of beans. Dallas sent Joe Martina to New orleans for two barrels of oysters. San Francisco shipped first baseman Jack Fenton to Memphis for a box of prunes. But when president Homer Hammond of San Antonio agreed to trade infielder Mike Dondero to Dallas for a dozen doughnuts, he managed to keep Dondero and have his doughnuts too; before signing the agreement, he ate them all up."

allard, i would take a plate of delicious, seasoned beans to never hear the words "jason grimsley" again. as a courtesy for my research, i'll assume my reservation in the stadium club has been made..